Holding My Hand

"Just because it scares you doesn't mean it's not the leap you were meant to take." Leonie Dawson

Some mornings are like this. It's as if I don't know which foot to start off on. Quotes that resonate with me have to do with fear, and I don't want to start my day that way or to go public with what scares me or even delve into finding out what's going on in my deep unknown. I just thought you might like to know that I'm not sure what I'm avoiding, but I feel comfortable you might know exactly what I'm writing about. So what scares me?

Maybe it has to do with embarking on three different trips in the next three weeks. I spend a lot of alone time writing, painting, and being familiar with who I am in my well known space with my well known friends and my stabilizing routines. I didn't think of these three trips as scaring me, and just because I realize I just might be doesn't mean I don't want to go and won't have a good time once I'm there. It does make me realize I need to hold my hand and let the little part of me know she can depend on me, that I'll be with her, that I need to check in with how she's feeling and be respectful.

Baruch ata adonai...I'm glad I'm working through what might be drawing me to quotes about fear. I know there are other fears, love and death for two, and remembering I need to comfort the little apprehensive girl inside me is so important. I move through my days enjoying what I do and comforted by the routine of it all. She goes along for the ride and feels safe, but now she's letting me know it's time to change gears. She is the bravest boldest part of me and she needs to know I'm here for her. Amen