Thursday, January 17, 2013

Trust the Very First Thing

"I believe in starting each project with a stated goal. Sometimes the goal is nothing more than a personal mantra such as 'keep it simple' remind me of what I was thinking at the beginning if and when I lose my way. I write it down on a slip of paper." Twyla Tharp, The Creative Habit

When I sit down to write a prayer, I trust the first thing that catches my eye, the first thing that resonates is what I need to stick with and write about. I trust that first instinctual reaction whether or not it makes sense to me. Yesterday I opened Twyla's book and the first thing I saw rang a bell. I love it when that bell rings and I take off. Sometimes what I see is something too deep or too sad or too confusing or too personal write about. Since I trust my inner caution, I know it's something I need to come back to, and no matter what I write that morning, I know there is something I've chosen not to deal with.

I've used Twyla's idea when I start an art project. Often that word is trust. Just trust. Trust what? I'm not sure. Trust that I'll find my way? Trust that I'll know when I'm done or trust that I need to stop working on it after twenty minutes? When I do this, when I write it down, when I take that thought seriously no matter how silly it might seem at the time, I am more intuitive in my work.

Tomorrow morning before the lists start, before I get up to write a prayer, I'm going to ask myself what my goal for the day is. Will you try this too? I'll let you know how this turns out for me.

Baruch ata adonai...may I let myself be aware of my intuitive thoughts today before I push them aside. May I be aware of uncomfortable feelings that might be behind untrue thoughts. Thank you. Amen