Monday, June 11, 2012

Hauled to the Next Step

"There is reality and then there is the movie your mind projects about that reality."
               --Byron Katie

Late yesterday an ancient nasty thought and I jostled along together. I ran ahead a few steps, and the thought struggled to stay close enough to tap me on the shoulder but couldn't wrap its hairy, slimy, disgusting arm around my neck to take me down. Oh great! A dust up with the bogey man right before bed! As I searched for what the heck I was doing to myself, I found a prayer I wrote two years ago on the same date which began with this quote from Byron Katie's book, "Loving What Is," a book bought with good intentions and still unread. Today's the day to start.

Baruch ata adonai, I've noticed how easily I slip in and out of being in the present moment by meditating on what the next meal will be, or daydreaming about what I'll do for fun in the grim months of winter, or even admiring work I created a year ago. Today instead of savoring wonderful feedback a friend gave me, my mind slipped into an unpleasant thought, fussed with it a bit and made it even more awful. Now instead of praying about staying in the present moment, I'm praying I'll be willing to do the work  clamoring for my attention.  Thank you for the gift of prayer and for leading me to this step. Amen

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